Just me a MOM..

Preemie life and Depression through my eyes.

Some help with depression…

Posted by Jenn on May 26, 2007

Many of you know that I have been dealing with depression for many years. There has been years that were worse than others. Yes I said Years! Things over the last couple of months have been a lot better. I have been dealing with things so much better. I have learned a couple of things that I would like to share…

1. Create a picture of yourself as you would like to be in the future, and then practice to become that kind of person you envision. You will be come what you practice. Remember who you are.

Write this stuff down. Make sure you put it in a place that you can see it. You will be able to become what you want to be. If you practice this imagine what your children, friends, and family will learn from you!

2.) Make the decision to get along with difficult people. Don’t delegate to them the control over your happiness or sadness. Remember who you are.

This was a hard one for me. There are several people in my life that I was giving them this power and didn’t even know. I had to learn that I need to forgive those people. I had to make amends with them. Even if they didn’t know I was. Which leads me to the next point.

3.) Forgive the hurtful actions of others. Forgive everyone everything, even if they are unaware that you have done so. When you forgive others you don’t let them off the hook– you let yourself off the hook. Remember who you are.

Holding grudges is one of my worst weaknesses. I hold on to the past. When something happens in the now that hurts me everything that has ever happened to me by that person comes out. I have learned to let the past be the past. If they have asked your forgiveness let it go. Its over and done with. If they haven’t asked your forgiveness LET IT GO! Think about how much energy you are wasting being mad at that person. You could be missing out on so many great memories.

4.) Help others feel encouraged. Everyone needs to have their batteries recharged periodically. And because of the pains and disappointments you have experienced you understand that. Remember who you are.

Please remember that no one can recharge your batteries like you can. Learn to love yourself and be proud of who you are. If you love yourself then it will be easier to recharge when others say hurtful things.

5.) Commit yourself to accept people as they are. There are reasons why people are the way they are. And you many never completely understand those reasons. You are an instrument to reach others. Remember who you are.

You never know what is going on in a persons home or life. Do judge or make assumptions about things unless you wear their shoes. Even then you still might not know what is going on.

What I have learned is that I can never know fully what someone is feeling. I was a pro at putting on a mask when I was with others. Only a chose few really knew my feelings. Some of those people thought they knew how to *fix* me. No one could fix me! I was the only one that could do that. It wasn’t until I hit rock bottom and I looked at myself at yelled I DON’T WANT TO LIVE LIKE THIS ANYMORE! I didn’t. I wanted to be Jennifer again. I wanted to be the mother my children deserved. I wanted to be the wife Chad needed. I was the only one that could make it work. Please if you have loved ones or friends that are dealing with depression. Love them. Do not in any circumstances tell them they are crazy or delusional. If they are on meds its okay. Just be there for them. Let them know that you care and love them. Talk to them. Hold them and love them. It will be okay. It will work out.

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One Response to “Some help with depression…”

  1. mom2mm said

    What a nice post! It is like you wrote this for me 🙂 I have too been dealing with depression for what seems like forever! I finally got help when I was 19, but looking back on it, I am sure I needed help before then. I have also had good and bad years. Thanks for the great tips!

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