Just me a MOM..

Preemie life and Depression through my eyes.

It’s Okay!

Posted by Jenn on April 1, 2008

I have been trying really hard to just really be calm this week. I am feeling like what our “normal” is starting to be is going to be okay. I have just spent the last couple of days just being a mom.

emily-profile-1.jpg  I have been able to cuddle with my Emily so much in the last 2 days its so much fun. She normally doesn’t like to cuddle. We have been singing songs and reading books and today she told me that she really needed a sister. I giggled and said well umm I am not sure about that. We talked about it a little bit and she told me that her name will be Sally Toga. I asked her what would happen if it was a boy and she told me that she only needed one brother, Zachary. She just really needs a sister. She even asked Chad if she could have one NOW! She told him that we just needed to go to Walmart and buy one. They are by the apples mom! DUH! It made me giggle. She is so funny. I have been trying to do more reading. I have a million books that I haven’t even read and now I am going to try to get through them. I am reading “I am a Mother” by Jane Clayson Johnson. So far it has been a pretty positive book for me. There is one part that has really touched my heart. It fits with what I have been dealing with in my head. She Quotes Jefferey R. Holland. It says “You are doing God’s work. You are doing it wonderfully well. He is blessing you, Even- No Especially- When your days and your nights may be most challenging. Like the woman who anonymously, meekly, perhaps even with hesitation and some embarrassment, fought her way through the crowd just to touch the hem of the master’s garment, so Christ will say to the women who worry and wonder and weep over their responsibility as mothers, Daughter, be of good comfort; thy faith hath made thee whole’.  And it will make your children whole as well.” 

Some times its so hard to have that faith the lord wants you to have. I have struggled with that very thing my whole life. I am working on it. I am getting more and more comfortable with the reality of my situation. As I get more and more answers the path that we are suppose to go down becomes more clear. Part of me wishes that I didn’t have to deal with Depression, Anxiety, and OCD on top of it all. I am getting there. Thanks for all the concern and love. Its nice to have people that care for me. I have an awesome support system.

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4 Responses to “It’s Okay!”

  1. kittenkat10 said

    Emily is so cute!! I love you! I love your family!

  2. Candace Hudson said

    I am so glad to hear that things are going better. Sounds like you are using your best stress relief resources…your kids. Laughter is the best medicine in the world. And our kids have a great way of bringing that out.

  3. Lisa M said

    Calm is very very good.

    I love Elder Holland.

    Today’s been a rough day for me. I’m so glad to read this.

    Thank you-

  4. Karen said

    I am so sorry we are not closer to help with things. We may not have any money right now but if I could I would be helping. I miss the kids. Watching Zachs talking video made me kind of sad, I miss him. But seeing Emily made me smile. Tell her I said hi.. Love you

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